Friday, September 24, 2010
I was a VERY bad Aire-girl!
Hey, everydoggie, kitty, hammie, bear and hooman! It's me, Patches! See these glasses? They almost made me a homeless doggie, this morning!
These are the glasses that our mom wears ALL the time! The last thing she does, at night before putting her head on her pillow, is take off these glasses and she puts them on the night stand right beside her bed! The very first thing she does BEFORE she gets up, is put the glasses on!
Well, we woke our mom up before she was ready, this morning, so she was a little bumfuzzled when she got up! She forgot the glasses and went into the bathroom. Now, you all know that I NEVER miss the opportunity to go in the bathroom with my mom, but for some strange reason, I let her go by herself! By the time she came out, she was more awake and reached for her glasses on the night stand, but they weren't there. The first thing she did was check her face, but they weren't there either and she couldn't see very well at all! You should hear the thoughts that were running through her head and the HBO words that were coming out of her mouth!
Boy, I got some new names, this morning, and none of them were GOOD! I just wanted to know how she knew it was ME! There are TWO Aire-girls in this house! Mom turned on the light in the living room and found her glasses on the floor, right beside my weiner doggie. I think he sneaked into the bedroom and took her glasses so he could "frame" me! Hahahahaha! Get it?..."frame" me? Sometimes I crack myself up! But I digress! Mom found the glasses and put them on, but she couldn't see much better than before she found them. They were covered in Aire-art and slobber! Also, she can't see a thing with the glasses off, so she had to feel around to see if there were any teeth marks. Fortunately, for me, she hasn't found any!
I guess I just narrowly escaped being a homeless doggie! On her way to the living room, Mom was seeing dollar signs and hoping she didn't have to shell out another $800! Yep, she paid a little over $800 for those tacky red glasses. (Patches' mom: I know they were expensive, but I had been in pretty much every store in the Atlanta area and couldn't find any frames that I liked. I accidentally ran into a Versace salesperson in my own eye doctor's office when I went in to tell him I hadn't found the right frames yet. I told her what I was looking for and she went out to her car and brought these in. Sold! So the fact that they are Versace (who cares?), they have Swarovski crystals at the corners (who cares again?) and they are Varilux lenses, make them cost over $800.)
My mom says that if she had to buy them today, she would have to get a much, much cheaper pair...like maybe some from WalMart's pharmacy department that cost around $20 a pair. Well, it all turned out okay since I didn't leave any chomper marks and my mom has finally quit calling me names! I knew she couldn't stay mad at me for very long!
Have a great weekend, everybuddy!
Patches (and Penny who NEVER steals Mom's glasses...or anything else either!)